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#13 The Fundamentals To Goal Setting

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The Fundamentals To Goal Setting

The Fundamentals To Goal Setting: 10 Steps to Achieving Impactful Goals

Many set the same New Year’s resolutions every year, hoping to see different results. They are stuck in the same cycle of setting goals, forgetting about them or failing to achieve or even to start them. What might not be surprising is that only 8% achieve their goals. 

It seems modern society encourages us to think about the next significant milestone or chase something new. However, we don’t think enough about accomplishing the goals with a strategy in mind. 

What is Goal Setting?

Goal setting is an intentional and detailed process that identifies a new pursuit, skill, or project and a plan for achieving it.

When you set goals, you take control of your life’s direction. Goals provide you with focus and clarity. Your decisions and actions should bring you closer to achieving those goals. 

“it is a never-ending path but we can enjoy the journey on the way” 

Hannah - Client

Getting positively uncomfortable

The real challenge is not deciding if you want the result but accepting the sacrifices required to achieve your goal. You must consider if you want the lifestyle that accompanies that goal. This is where planning is essential as it will identify what must change to accomplish the goal. 

Before the exhilarating and enchanting outcome, do you want the dull and unappealing process? Everybody wants a gold medal, but not everybody wants to train like an Olympian.

Goal setting is about choosing the rewards you want and the sacrifice you are willing to pay.

How to Set Goals You'll Follow in 10 Steps

1. Start With Why

To identify the goal you want to achieve, you need to start with why you want to achieve it in the first place. It has to be something meaningful to you and not what is expected. For example, if you consider being a parent in the next five years, your why might be healthy to keep up with your child’s play activities and sports. A parent would need plenty of energy from rest, mindfulness, diet, movement and more. An expectation could be societies pressure to be skinny. The latter isn’t your personal motivator and will cause you internal conflict when trying to achieve your goal. Whereas the former is a more compelling and exciting reason to be working on your health. 

2. Prioritise the Ultimate Goal

Before you set the Ultimate Goal, take a closer look at what you’re trying to achieve and ask yourself the following questions: 

  • Does the goal allow you to get closer to your why?
  • Is this goal something you genuinely want right now? 
  • Is it important enough for the necessary effort and lifestyle change? 

If you’re unwilling to put in the time and effort, it may not be worth pursuing. Everything in life comes down to priorities and what you would like to achieve – conscious choices and subconscious decisions. Life becomes a series of messy experiences you struggle to manage without setting goals or objectives. You become the plaything of coincidence. 

One of the most significant obstacles to achieving goals is other goals. Sometimes you can overestimate your achievements which leave you struggling with your time and attention. Whenever you work on a new goal, you are taking focus and energy from your other goals. 

One of the quickest ways to make progress on your Ultimate Goal is to wait on less essential goals and focus on one Ultimate Goal at a time. It would be best to reorganise your priorities to allow improvement to come faster because you are now fully committed. 

3. Process, Not Outcome

Focusing on the process is one of the most challenging parts of setting and achieving goals. Due to the nature of a goal, you start with the end in mind. However, it’s the tiny steps you take to get there that matter. For example, the outcome you want to achieve is confidence in large public speaking events. That’s the goal. But working towards this goal, you discover that you are most comfortable in small interactive groups. Did you fail at achieving this goal? Not if you believe in the power of the process. 

In good time, you will build up the courage to speak publicly to large audiences, but you’re less inclined to keep trying if you think you’ve failed. 

4. Plan For It

Many choose an Ultimate Goal but never create an action plan to determine how they will achieve it. Your action plan should include all the necessary steps you need to take to get there – no matter how small they may appear. Grab a piece of paper and get writing. This will help you with the next step. 

As mentioned earlier, you need to be sure you are willing your change your lifestyle to get closer to achieving your Ultimate Goal. Now is the time to create the Evolving Goals, which change as you grow. They are designed for the next three months and focus on the habit changes.

If you want to be that parent with high energy, the habit could focus on regular sleeping for the next three months.

If you want confidence in public speaking, the habit could be reading a script out loud at home. 

5. Habit Stacking

There was a study that asked the participants to complete the following: “During the next week, I will partake in at least 20 minutes of vigorous exercise on [DAY] at [TIME OF DAY] at/in [PLACE].” The conclusion of this research shows that you are between 2x to 3x more likely to stick to your goals if you make a specific plan for when, where, and how. 

After/Before [CURRENT HABIT], I will [NEW HABIT].

Here are some examples:

  • Sleep. After I have my dinner, I will read my book and rest my mind.
  • Meditation: Before I have my morning shower, I will meditate for ten minutes.
  • Situps: Before I make my bed, I will do 30 situps.
  • Water: Before I leave the house for work, I will drink some water.
  • Emails: After I’ve had my lunch, I will complete my emails. 
  • Job hunting: After I have my dinner, I will email my CV to the job I want.

Habit stacking and implementation intentions help us move from the goal in our heads to the specific process that will make it a reality.

6. Write Your Goals Down

When you write your goals down, they become real and tangible instead of a vague idea that lives in your mind. Once you’ve written your goals, keep them somewhere visible. Put them on your wardrobe doors, near your computer screen, or on the mirror in the bathroom for when you brush your teeth. Look at it weekly or, better yet, daily.

This tactic reminds you to keep working on your goals often. As you’re writing down your goals, use a positive tone, so you stay excited about achieving them.

7. Align Your Environment With Your Goals

Many of the decisions we make in our lives result from our surroundings.

Before sleeping, browsing social media is likely to be the default action if you go to bed with your phone in your hands. Eating is more likely the default action if your cupboards are filled with biscuits and cakes.

The same can be said for positive surroundings.

By storing a kettlebell next to your sofa, you are more likely to do kettlebell swings instead of sitting watching TV. Drinking water instead of coffee is more likely to be the default action if you have a bottle of water on your desk. 

8. Make It Public

You are more likely to stick to the goals if you tell someone about them. Share it on social media and provide updates. The encouragement can keep you accountable. 

9. Measure Your Goals

We all love to receive feedback – it is very human. The boost in our motivation is when we can see our progress. This doesn’t have to be validated by others. It can be an internal validation. Not everyone will understand your why as they have a different direction to travel in. Measurement is so critical for practical goal setting. By measuring your results, you get insight into whether you are making progress.

Check out the SMART goal setting PDF.

10. Take Action And Evolve Your Goals

Now that you’ve planned everything out, it’s time to take action. You didn’t go through all that work to forget about your goal. Every step you take should lead to another until you finish your Evolving Goal, and then it is time to repeat the process until you achieve the Ultimate Goal.

What shall you do now? 

Join the Goals & Accountability group for £39 per month or book in a call with me. I can help you find the right course of action for YOU. We can talk about your dreams, goals, desires and map out how you can achieve them.

Take the steps today to build your tomorrow!

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#5 Vanquish Procrastination

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Vanquish procrastination

#5 Vanquish Procrastination

So, you’ve got a writing task or two that’s needing to be done, and well, em… you’ve got more than enough time to get them completed.


But, for some reason, this time seems to slip away, completely undetected and under the radar, until boom, you’re ferociously working at the speed of light with a few hours left.

And what’s more, it doesn’t happen now and again completely out of the blue. It’s a regular occurrence, popping its carefree head up too often.

Let me introduce you to the little old jiminy cricket that is procrastination…

What is procrastination?

Think of Procasti-Nation (procrastination) as the world we live in, and as you journey through, there are many regular stop-offs. 

You might visit places like: 

  • Snooze-Land
  • Rush-Zone
  • Perfection-Avenue
  • Consumption-Alley
  • Fear-City 
  • Snack-District

Sound familiar? 

Maybe not right now, but as you dive deeper, you will realise you’ve probably been on a 1st class ticket to more than one of these destinations many times.

Procrastination is when we choose to delay something important to a later date down the line favouring something else that’s easy and fun, providing instant gratification. 

It’s the opposite of motivation, or willingness to work.

Procrastination is the reason why many people find themselves scrabbling around at the last minute to meet deadlines after continuously making bad decisions whenever they had enough time to start with. 

It lives entirely in the present moment, has no memory of the past and has no knowledge of the future. 

Many people think that procrastination is a form of laziness, and while this can be true, often it’s not.

It’s not uncommon to find someone with high procrastination tendencies putting off writing their assignment instead of tidying their room.

Now you wouldn’t say cleaning your room is lazy, would you?

This is procrastination at its finest. Doing something completely unrelated to the task at hand, so you don’t have to do what actually needs doing.

Why do we procrastinate?

We procrastinate because it gives our minds some free time, a break from the tedious monotony of that dreaded task that needs doing.

It acts as relief and makes us happy in the short term.

It answers the fears and doubts we might have about not being able to complete our work.

Procrastination is the ultimate scapegoat. 

We do it because it’s usually always easy and convenient. 

Procrastination offers the opposite to the struggles of focus and hard work, and happens for many reasons:

  1. Lack of defined goals
  2. Feeling overwhelmed 
  3. Lack of foresight into the future 
  4. Accountability
  5. Habits 
  6. Mindset blocks 
  7. Lack of planning

Overall, we procrastinate because our motivation gets hindered by factors such as exhaustion and rewards that seem too far away at present. Fear of failure and anxiety take over and cause our minds to search for the quick fix solution.

Now you’re probably asking what causes all of this procrastination?

What causes procrastination?

7 causes of procrastination

What are the 4 types of procrastination?

#1. The anxious

Taking on work or specific tasks usually comes with a degree of anxiety or stress. But, it’s how you deal with this anxiety that determines the outcome for you. 

It’s one thing to meet this work head-on, but it’s also a lot easier to take the nearest cab to ‘Fear-City.’

“Let’s go there and keep worrying; that way, we’ll never have to take action and get the work done”, might be what you are telling yourself amidst all these fears.

Many people get so wrapped up in doubts about their abilities and how to manage their workload that it often leads to no free time, and you betcha — procrastination!

#2. The fun

This type of procrastinator wants to do anything but the task at hand. They would rather be doing all the fun stuff and not the boring work. 

I mean, sometimes it’s hard to argue with the option of going to the beach, or writing that 3000 word essay…

#3. The “plenty of time”

If you’re set a project deadline for a long way off, it can be difficult to kick yourself into gear and make a start.

This is where it’s all too easy to find yourself pulling up the handbrake and spending too much time in ‘Snack-District.’

Taking a little time out here and there will surely not have any dwindling effect on the overall project, right?

Wrong! 

This makes it very easy for procrastination to sink in, and you know what comes next.

Yea, the handbrake is getting nearly yanked off as you zoom for ‘Rush-Zone’ and that dreaded deadline in a few days.

#4. The perfectionist

Have you ever given something so much thought because you wanted it to be perfect that you overthink the entire situation and never end up doing what it is you set out to do in the first place?

This is slamming your foot hard on the gas and steering straight for ‘Perfection-Alley’ — in a nutshell.

Some people strive for perfection every time, which really isn’t possible.

Not only will it drive you completely bonkers in the process, but it will lead you into the deepest, darkest caverns of procrastination imaginable.

Effects of procrastination

Procrastination can have many different negative effects on us.

In fact, one study conducted by APA (american physiological association) indicates that 94% of people said procrastination harmed their happiness, and 18% said it had an extremely negative impact.

In the beginning, it might seem like closing that assignment down to go on YouTube is harmless. But over a prolonged period, this seemingly harmless act can spiral out of control quite quickly. 

And before you know it, you’re down the rabbit hole every time you need to be doing something productive.

The feelings we get from procrastination can be as such:

  • Guilt
  • Anger
  • Dread
  • Anxiety
  • Hatred

All these emotions are usually experienced by a person when it’s too late. They’ve put the thing off for too long, and now they see no way out. 

Can you see how procrastination can be severely damaging to your mental state and wellbeing? 

Is procrastination a mental illness?

It’s understandable why many people might think of procrastination as being a mental illness. But it’s not.

Procrastination is a bad habit usually formed over years of leaving tasks to the last minute before completion.

Yet, it’s important to understand that, while they’re not caused by procrastination, anxiety and depression can get worse through this habit.

Procrastination is a symptom, not a disorder. And you should look at what’s causing it in the first place?

Suppose depression is causing a severe lack of motivation and energy, and in turn, you are procrastinating a lot because of this. In that case, you need to tackle it before anything else!

ADHD and procrastination are also closely linked, but this is more to do with the fact that people with ADHD have a problem concentrating to begin with.

Naturally, with concentration issues, this leads to procrastination. 

How to overcome procrastination

We can take a few different measures to focus your mind, overcome procrastination, and get motivation back where it needs to be.

Create Timelines

Creating timelines is a great way to overcome procrastination.

Having something to use that will keep you accountable is great for motivation and a get-it-done attitude.

Timelines prevent us from racing into ‘Snooze-Land.’ 

I mean, when some things must be completed by a specific date, and it’s written down in front of us in black and white, there’s not much time for being lazy and sleeping.

When structuring these, avoid going too big and risk stretching out your time, giving procrastination a big heads up.

But also, be sure not to go too small either, so you don’t risk setting an unrealistic time to get the work done and cause more stress.

Set Smaller Goals

When you set goals that you are more than capable of, you set yourself up to succeed. 

You see, goals that you know are achievable get done.

If you set unrealistic goals, what are the chances of you going through with them? 

It’s better to meet your goals even if they aren’t as great as you would have liked for the time being than not to meet any of them at all. 

Reward Yourself

It would help if you got into the habit of rewarding yourself for small wins along the way. 

Too many of us undeservedly reward ourselves nowadays and not only does this mess with our procrastination habits, but it also creates a false sense of accomplishment. 

Create an excellent environment

Distractions play a big role in the procrastinator’s life, especially digital devices. With everything being one click of a button now, it’s no wonder procrastination is so easy these days.

Simply turning off notifications on your phone or putting it on airplane mode will help tremendously when battling procrastination. 

Keeping everything clean and tidy at your workstation is another excellent way to have an ideal environment and help you out. 

Your focus and mental clarity will be a lot better when not having to worry about whats were.

Have brain breaks 

Have you ever sat down for a good 5 hours of working? Seems almost impossible at times. But what if you broke those 5 hours down into 45 min sessions with a 15 min break between. 

This seems far less daunting than the initial 5 hours, and it will also help you keep contraction better.

Create a vision statement to help you stay on track

Now that we have identified what procrastination is and how it can detract from your daily productivity, this is an excellent opportunity for you to put a framework in place for going forward.

Your vision statements should include health, career, wealth, family, friends, personal growth, physical environment, health and romance aspirations ten years from now. 

Notice when procrastination shows up and how it can impact your ten-year vision. 

If you feel like you’re going around in circles, you’re not sure where to start, or maybe you’ve created your vision statement but would just like a second opinion from an expert. A coaching session is a great way to find clarity and talk over your goals.

"You don’t have to be great to start, but you have to start to be great.”

Zig Ziglar

Need further help with setting your goals and being accountable? Get in touch. We have coaching services starting from £39 per month that will help you set compelling goals and achieve them with coaching techniques and a supportive community cheering you on.

Book a 30-minute call with me, Tammy Whalen Blake, to enrol you on the best program for your personal development.

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#10 Boost Your Confidence

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boost your confidence

#10 Boost Your Confidence

What is it that is holding you back? When I say ‘holding you back’, I mean, stopping you from fulfilling your true potential and realising your dreams? 

Most people hold themselves back because of a lack of confidence in themselves and their abilities. We’ve always been taught to follow the rules, speak when spoken to and to live within the confines of our station within society.

This is where the majority of people will stay, looking through the glass, wondering what life on the other side is like. 

For those that have rebelled against these views and have broken free of the metaphorical shackles, they have moulded their lives into whatever they have dared to dream. 

As we grow, we learn how the world works and what our capabilities are; but, the older we get, we start to forget that, as we learn, it takes time to understand and master a subject. We cannot know everything instantly.

Our lives are no exception yet we expect to be able to know everything about everything, either at the touch of a button or just through life experience. But, how can we ever know how to ‘be’ just by Googling the question?

Like all things, becoming the person we desire takes time and growing our confidence is no different. We need to understand that this trait isn’t something that is handed out to the privileged few but it’s within all of us from the start; we just need to learn how to discover it and use it wisely. Confidence is a skill that needs time to be learned and nurtured.

For example, do you remember learning to ride a bike as a child? I do; it was a confusing and oftentimes, painful experience. When I had learnt how to engage my brain and my feet together on the pedals, I was able to master riding unaided. This didn’t happen in 5 minutes; it happened over a long period of time with lots of support from loved ones as well as much practice from me. 

What I’m trying to get at is, YOU HAVE THE CONFIDENCE WITHIN YOU… you just need to find it and master it; just like riding a bike.

Within time and finding opportunities to push your boundaries, you will be able to recognise this confidence and start to feel more at ease with bringing it out into the world.

What can you do to find your confidence?

I’ve worked with many people that have experienced the same issue and with support and expert guidance, they have all been able to uncover aspects of themselves they didn’t believe existed. 

One client, Hannah, was in a dark place and had lost her self worth and the belief that she was capable of achieving her dreams. She was in a perpetual cycle of negative self-talk and had hit rock bottom. Just a few sessions later, we had identified the triggers for her lack of confidence and what she needed to do to silence the negative voices and she set her goals for what she wanted to achieve, thus rediscovering the fire inside of her. 

One of the things she said which I think we should all remember is …

“it is a never-ending path but we can enjoy the journey on the way” 

Hannah

We need to remember that, just because we believe we are something, doesn’t mean we can’t invest in our own growth and transformation into what we want to be; it’s just a reminder that it is a journey and not an immediate result.

Just wanting to build on your own confidence is the best start to your journey. Get a pen and a notepad and jot down what your heart truly desires. Are there some wild dreams that you could never imagine being possible? Write them all down! This is YOUR list of dreams, set to become a tangible set of goals.

Next, you will need to think about each point you have written and identify why you haven’t pursued it or why it hasn’t previously been successful. What is it that has held you back? What stopped you from getting to the end goal?  

Here are some common thoughts that will slowly erode your confidence to push your boundaries. Which ones do you identify with?:

  • I’m not good enough
  • What will they think?
  • I’m not from the right background to achieve that
  • I wouldn’t know where to start with that so I’ll stay safe and not bother
  • I’m not intelligent enough
  • I haven’t got enough qualifications
  • I’ve failed at so many other things, I’d only fail again
  • I’m not brave enough

We all have doubts in ourselves from time to time but to let the negative rule our lives constantly will only lead to self-doubt and our goals remaining in the impossible dream category.

Now you have your written list of dreams, put it somewhere you will see it daily. Remind yourself what you want to achieve and who you want to be. This reminder will be a daily catalyst to make the changes you need, in order to achieve your dreams.

Take it to the next level...

Now, make a list of goals that will help you achieve the points on your list. Identify where you would need to step out of your comfort zone and make sure you keep these as a priority. Even if it makes you feel on edge about ticking these off, try and push yourself to get them done, sooner rather than later. 

Let’s look at an example:

Jonny runs regularly to keep fit but has always wanted to run a marathon. He has never had the confidence to consider it before as He doesn’t feel he could ever run the whole distance and worries that his friends and family would laugh at the thought of it. 

By taking the simple steps above, Jonny writes down his main goal of running the London Marathon. He then breaks it down into smaller goals:

  • Make an application for the marathon for next year
  • Tell his closest family and friends that he has applied – celebrate it on social media
  • Hire a personal trainer for two sessions a month for accountability
  • Increase daily runs by 10 minutes per day
  • Complete a half marathon within the next 6 months
  • Run a practice distance at least once a month within 6 months

As Jonny ticks off each of the goals to realise his dream, he is building his confidence to actually complete the marathon. 

As you achieve each goal, make sure to reflect on your progress and look at how you accomplished it. How does it make you feel to tick it off the list? What did you do that took you out of your comfort zone? How did this build your confidence? 

You can now see how to get to where you want to be and what are the blockades in the way. Building your confidence slowly will give you the momentum to move from one thing to the next, smashing through the barriers that once held you in limbo.

By looking at the destination, we can map out how we can get there. We might hit a few bumps in the road but we know that if we slow down, identify the risk, continue slowly and surely, we will get to the other side. This is how we grow and evolve as humans. 

Take a look at my video about overcoming my fear of online videos. 

What will you do now? You’ve identified to yourself that you want to build your confidence to realise your dreams. Going it alone is possible but can be scary without the right support.

Make sure you get your closest friends and family onboard and understand what it is that you are looking to achieve and tell them how they can best support you.

Book in a call with me. We can chat about where your limiting beliefs have come from and I can help you find the right course of action for YOU. We can talk about your dreams, goals, desires and map out how you can achieve what you may be thinking is impossible.

Take the steps today to build your tomorrow!

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5 Keys Leader Use To Get Ahead

Leaders not burning out

5 Keys Leader Use To Get Ahead

Leaders not burning out

We are inspired by role models in our society, and sometimes it feels like they are so perfect and there’s no way we can be like them.  But that’s not true! Successful people develop successful habits.  

Here are 5 just to get you started:  

  1. They have CLARITY on their vision, values, and priorities. To be more specific, they know what they want to achieve, what they stand for, and they make time for the activities that get them there.  Getting clear on these things acts like a compass to them. It directs their thoughts and actions. It tells them what to say YES to and what to say NO to.  
  2. They create a CONDUCIVE ENVIRONMENT.  Successful leaders work smart. And they know that there is power in surrounding themselves with great people. In their success group are role models they aspire to be, supportive peers to help them stay positive, and a coach to help them see what they don’t see. 
  3. They are ADAPTIVE COMMUNICATORS.  They know how to relate to different types of people.  They can inspire people to take action. They are a positive influence for their team and peers. As a result, they become a success magnet.   They spend less time chasing opportunities; instead, opportunities come to them. 
  4. They don’t just focus on the money.  They FOCUS ON EXCELLENCE. Money will come if you show value.  Therefore, money is the result; showing value is the cause. There’s no point stressing over results; just focus on what causes the results and get better on it.  And this mindset creates a more resourceful way of thinking – the kind of thinking innovators have. And because of that, they make better decisions. 
  5. They KEEP THEIR POSTURE. In a study at Stanford Business School, they examined the qualities in leadership. It concluded with two qualities for success are putting a team together and patience under pressure.  Staying calm under pressure requires a high level of mindfulness and practicing certain behaviours regularly. I help people identify the triggers that get them agitated, and help them to convert their habits to get back to calm.

So there it is the 5 keys! Easier said than done, you say? I agree.  My own experience implementing these 5 keys in my own life taught me that it’s not easy and I’m glad I had a coach to guide me along the way.  

Are you committed to your success? 

Invest 30 minutes with me and let’s get clear on which key you should start with, what impact it can make in your life, and how you can get started.  Let me ask you the key questions you’ll need to get rid of any limiting beliefs that may be holding you back.

Schedule your call here https://gotoyellow.co.uk/schedule-a-call/ and let’s get you to turn your dreams into reality

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The Problem With Goal Setting

The Problem With Goal Setting

The Problem with goal-setting 1

THE PROBLEM WITH GOAL-SETTING

While 93% of the population set New Year’s resolutions, only 8% go on to achieve. So why don’t these goals get executed?  Perhaps many people have been following an ineffective approach. 

Let’s explore the reason why goals often don’t get implemented and what you can do differently.  

WHAT vs WHY? 

The goal is WHAT you want to achieve.  But lots of WHATs are not done because the WHY is not clear.  Here’s a common example. You know that daily exercise is good for you.  Many of you may have even set a daily goal to exercise. But only some of you are doing it.  Maybe you have a clear WHY, like a recent accident that made you realise how important it is to keep healthy… or trying to fit into a dress for a special event…  your WHY is very clear. 

But others fail to achieve their goal because they had less clarity on the WHY, or perhaps not emotionally-attached to their WHY.  So the WHAT is just an activity without a clear purpose. And before you know it, other things take priority.  

So before you set a goal, you must know why you are doing it in the first place. More importantly, it must be something that motivates YOU. Something deep and meaningful. 

There is a process I use to guide people to dig deep to their WHY.  And it’s surprising that when we get to your WHY, you’ll discover that your goals change.  You may not want to achieve the old WHAT you had previously planned. 

This may seem relatively simple, doesn’t it? But the challenge of digging your own WHY is that you stop before you get to the core and settle for a superficial WHY.  And this is ineffective because it doesn’t give you the motivation to achieve your WHAT, especially when distractions come. 

Ready to go deeper on this topic? 

Let me help you dig your WHY.  I will give you 30 minutes of my time free of charge and, in return, you will give me an open mind to explore yourselves deeper.  I only have 5 slots a week to do this, so make sure you book one of them. I would like you to feel what it’s like to get clarity and see the impact it makes to your goals. 

Schedule your call here https://gotoyellow.co.uk/schedule-a-call/ and let’s start your 2020 off to a great start.

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Tammy Whalen Blake

Tammy Whalen Blake

Founder of go to yellow
Personal Development Coach