Posted on November 2, 2020January 31, 2023 by Tammy Whalen Blake

Break Free From Overworking

Redefining Success | Resorting Life Balance

break free from overworking

#6 Break Free From Overworking

Do you jump out of bed feeling alive or do you drag yourself to the kitchen to load up on caffeine to get your brain going, to fight another day?

Overwork can lead to exhaustion; not just physical exhaustion but mental exhaustion too.

We’ve all been there, trying to get the hours in to achieve a goal or live up to the expectations of others with our lives ending up consumed by work and the mental load it can bring. This situation is never going to lend itself well to a greater life balance or your ultimate happiness.

But, how have we gone from being free-spirited, young and aspirational, to overworked, overwhelmed and tired adults?

Is your workload or employer pushing you to achieve more than is realistically possible? Are your goals and perfectionism zapping your life away in order to meet your own expectations? Are you simply taking on too much of everything, not confident enough to reach out for help?

Here are some classic ROOT CAUSES to the issue:

SOCIAL NORMS – These are the ones that are telling you that you have to work hard to make sure you hit the ‘milestones’ like marriage, mortgage, kids, career etc. Norms function to provide order and predictability in society. Overall people want approval and belonging, and those who do not follow the norms will suffer disapproval or may even be outcast from others.

EXPECTATIONS – either yours or those of the people around you. Family, friends, colleagues, clients, society; you get the picture. We tend to try to live up to the expectations or what we perceive to be the expectations of others. Have you ever asked the question as to what is being expected of you or have you decided what these are yourself?

PROMOTERS – The news, social media, advertising, commercial propaganda. These will all tell you what you should be aspiring to and the goals that you should be working towards but are they really what your heart desires or are they actually keeping you penned in and broke? These are the visions of others, in order to achieve their own goals. Switch off to them and you may be surprised at how different your own desires are when you have properly tuned in.

In reality, there are probably a hundred more reasons and variables as to why someone is overworked and overwhelmed. Until we look at where we are and what we actually want and need out of life, we can’t possibly start to rectify the situation. But, living like this, on repeat, will only have negative consequences, down the line, if you don’t make the necessary changes to reclaim your balance NOW.

To make the change now, you need to get off of the perpetual ‘merry-go-round’

From where you are, start making a time audit of everything in your day, for the next 7 days. Look back after this time and you might be surprised at the results. Take some time to really analyse where you are overstretched and what the issue is, to you personally.

Working smarter instead of harder is key. This will help you to claim back as much time as possible to do the things that will bring you greater results.

Finding as much joy in our lives should be one of our greatest goals with everything else working in alongside. Work should be there to complement this and not take centre stage.

By looking at your existing habits, you can look at the bigger picture and figure out what areas need changing. Where do you waste the most time and where can you rework your schedule to bring maximum efficiency and effective time management. Where can you ask for help?

Also, creating boundaries and making space for ‘downtime’ is essential for an effective life balance.

Here are some handy tips to keep the harmony in an over-stretched day:

Routine – create a routine so you have one less obstacle to challenge you every day. This will at least give others an idea of when you will be free and when you are not. Schedule in specific times for work, family and personal time.

Keep a diary – keeping track of all appointments, dates and events is an impossible task without some way of noting them in the same place. Whether your preference is a good old fashioned hardback or a more streamlined digital diary system, make a point to keep it up to date and check in with it first thing in the morning so you are prepared for the day ahead.

Plan – planning goes a long way to keep you organised and efficient which could help if you are overworking yourself. As you should check your diary at the beginning of the day, assess your diary and the requirements for the week before it starts. If your week starts on a Monday, use Sunday evening to check in with what you need to achieve or do in the coming days so that you can feel prepared. When this is done, use it as a marker to start your wind downtime, hopefully feeling more in control and at peace.

Take breaks – this is especially important if you work from home. It’s all too tempting to work through lunch etc., but by taking a break and stepping away for even the shortest of periods can refresh your focus and can increase your productivity. A great tip is the Pomodoro technique which uses timed work periods and rests breaks in between, check it out here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ykMzzZolhdk

Rest – making sure that we schedule in a sensible bedtime as well as some time to ‘chill out’ after a long day gives our bodies and our brains a chance to slow down and recuperate. Make sure you are taking enough time to relax before hitting the hay to give yourself the best chance of a good night of sleep. Lack of sleep or good quality sleep will only compound the issue.

Outsource – if you are finding it difficult to keep up with all of the demands of life and work, take a look at what you can outsource. Could you take on a cleaner to make your home a more relaxing place to be? Would a gardener give you back some time at the weekends to be able to go and see family? If you run a business as I do, would an extra pair of hands be useful? I quickly realised that I couldn’t wear all of the hats in my business as it was eating into my efficiency as well as my life. My solution was to outsource some of the tasks that took me away from what I did best, so I hired a freelance assistant.

Have firm boundaries – how many times have you agreed to do something for someone or said ‘yes’ to something when you know that you will struggle to fit it all in? Having firm boundaries will let people know when not to approach you and say ‘no’ when you are under pressure is OK. Too many people think that they will be letting someone down if they can’t agree to every job, function, requirement etc. Being a ‘Yes’ person isn’t healthy in the long run and can only add to your stress levels. Be strong and learn to decline!

Identifying the lack in our lives is always the first step to identifying where we can gain.

Only when you can see where you are going wrong can you make the changes to get the results you have wanted. Being overworked is not a situation anybody wants to be in, even when they love what they do. We have to make sure our lives are in equilibrium and balanced to give all areas enough focus to maintain our health and wellbeing.

We all need to take a breather sometimes and this is your CALL TO ACTION!

Make an analysis and work from there. Make sure you implement some changes that make a difference immediately and the rest will follow.

If you need further help, book a call with me and we can establish some boundaries that you need to make and where you can implement changes to bring the life you are searching for. Reaching out for help is a strength, not a weakness that we are so often led to believe.

Download my E-Book for a more in-depth look at this ever-increasing problem. It may bring even more clarity to your situation and, you never know, it may change your life forever!

Get the download here – https://1.gotoyellow.co.uk/exclusive-ebook

Tammy Whalen Blake

Founder of go to yellow
Personal Development Coach

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I was privileged enough to receive Tammy’s incredible personal development coaching and the experience was amazing. Tammy’s knowledge & skills clearly shine through when working with her. Tammy’s energy and approach in which she delivers the sessions are perfect and I feel much clearer on the areas of my life my focus is now on and the ways in which I will achieve the improvement I am after.

I reached out to Tammy as I was struggling to find clarity in my vision of the future. Tammy's process was brilliant, we worked a lot on my values, and from this work my vision and mission has naturally fallen into place. It was an enlightening process. Tammy is quick thinking, insightful and challenging and suits the way I think. I'm looking forward to our future of working together and I fully recommend her to any of you who feel a little lost on their journey.

The value add for me, so far, is that Tammy doesn’t just talk about the tools but actually shows you how to use those tools to help you make refinements.For example, I was struggling with continuously carrying over uncompleted actions from one week to the next. This left me feeling frustrated and pessimistic about my ability to get things done. Within the first coaching session Tammy coached me how to set smaller and realistic goals. Within 2 days I’ve achieved progress.Whereas I struggled for a whole month, previously, to even make a start.

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It's Your Turn

Posted on October 28, 2020January 31, 2023 by Tammy Whalen Blake

Restoring Life Balance

Redefining Success | Resorting Life Balance

restoring life balance

#2 Restoring Life Balance

Is Negative Overwhelm Getting You Down?

Do you feel like you’re treading water with not enough time to enjoy the fruits of your labour? Let me assure you, this is all too common, but it isn’t right.

It could be that you are spending too much time consumed by your workload, or you’re feeling the burden of unrealistic expectations being placed on you by others. It may be that you are letting your ‘To Do’ list govern your every waking moment, leaving you feeling fretful when you aren’t under pressure.

These issues seem to be a recurring theme with many people I talk to. The context may not be the same but the underlying issues are. We can all feel like this from time to time but we must recognise when we need to make changes.

Everything in life must have balance but how is balance defined? In life, balance is when you feel content and fulfilled in all areas; health, wealth, family, romance, work, physical environment, recreation, friends.

When we give our focus to each area of life equally, we then find that we feel more at peace with ourselves and where we are on our journey.

This is a key sign that you need to readdress where your energy is being spent.

BUT, Is the problem really OVERWHELM? Let’s dig a little deeper…

Often, there are other reasons why we keep ourselves busy.

🤯Sometimes, we use the excuse of being ‘busy’ to forget about other things that might be bothering us in life or we might feel the expectations placed on us are causing us to feel this discontent.

🤯The other argument could be that the adrenaline of stress is keeping us addicted to the motion of the proverbial hamster wheel.

These things are all within our control to change and we are the only ones that are creating this way of life.

In essence, the workload isn’t keeping us on a knife-edge, our mindset is.

Can you identify yourself with any of these personality traits?

➡️ PEOPLE PLEASER – You constantly ‘People Please’ and struggle to say ‘NO’ because you believe your self-worth is dependent on helping others.

➡️ BUSY BADGE WEARER – Wearing the ‘Busy Badge’ to keep a sense of pride and purpose and using it as an excuse to cancel or get out of plans as ‘YOU’ time isn’t your priority.

➡️ THE BEST – Keeping up the appearance of being in control and working all of the hours because you fear inadequacy. Delegation is a struggle!

The chances are, if you’re feeling under pressure, one or more of these titles will align with how you’re feeling. Can you see how your beliefs and views could have brought you to live this way?

‘But WHAT can I do about it!?’ I hear you cry. How can I feel less stressed?

Well, my first piece of advice is STOP!

Just stop.

Get off the hamster wheel, stop pedalling and find some headspace. If you can, get yourself away from the situation and take some time for you!

Spend some time thinking about what life balance means to you.

✅ What would you love to spend more of your time on?

✅ What areas of your life do you feel you have neglected?

✅ Are there any hobbies that you would like to rediscover or pastimes that have been long forgotten in the mire of overwork?

Taking some time out will help you gain a better sense of clarity as to what you would ideally like to achieve. Only when you know what your goal is can you go about setting the foundations to help you reach your ideal balanced lifestyle.

Life balance will look different for everybody; it all depends on what we personally hold important. The idea of balance will be a totally different ball game to a new mother who needs time to relax and rediscover herself to someone who is just out of Uni, looking to build a career and still wanting to enjoy a full social life.

Investing your energy in yourself is a great basis to bring back some self-respect.

No matter what situation you are in, there will most likely be an opportunity to delegate tasks to others.

➡️ If you live with family, have a think who can pick up some of the chores to free up some time to dedicate to the things you want to do instead of the tasks that drain you.

➡️ If you are running a business, can you onboard some freelance help or invest in an employee who can help grow your business? Keeping you mentally on track is more likely to bring success.

➡️ Have you got friends who could help with running some errands for you? Taking some of the pressure off of your shoulders will help centre you and rediscover time to refocus on the important tasks, thus reducing overwork and overwhelm.

Community is an essential part of being a human; living in a pack. Look at asking for help as a strength of character, not a weakness. Most of the time, people feel more valued when helping others.

➡️ Creating boundaries and making space for ‘downtime’ are also essential for an effective work-life balance.

➡️ Creating a routine that you stick with will take away some of the daily, unimportant decision makings. Keep a schedule and refer to it at least once a day. Make sure you take enough time out and get enough rest. Life balance should be about spending as much time resting and enjoying life as working.

If we are constantly working, we are not in a true growth mindset.

Organising your time in advance will ease the burden but spontaneity in our personal lives can keep a level of excitement and adventure. The key to beating the overwhelm is to make sure we are making time for fun and giving ourselves the opportunity to just ‘be’.

If it feels like a mountain that climbing alone is too much, this is the time when a coaching session is a sensible step to finding harmony in your life.

By chatting it through, we can find the real root of the cause and put some actionable steps in place to alleviate pressure and to help you gain clarity and the time to focus on your goals.